I don’t remember what the world looked like before this darkness settled over me. It has made its home inside my head and I cannot evict it.
It is a gorgeous day. My children are here… yet all I have done is watch the clock to take them to their father’s so I can consider my options.
I will once again open up my bottle of pills… I will count them. I will calculate how many it takes… then I will contemplate taking them.
It’s barely 1 pm and I am getting sleepy. I know this is my brain’s way of shutting me down when I am about to do something drastic.
The problem is it will happen again.
… and again, and again… until one day it will finally end.
I am exhausted.
Satisfyingly Complicated 